kyuubijrr:

chaussettesock:

turtlessuggest:

Indian Roof Turtle, about as close to a dragon turtle as we’re likely to get.

Burmese Roof Turtle, with a banana for a head

Diamondback Terrapin, the Rorschach of turtles

Red-Bellied Short-Necked Turtle, just look at those colors!

Burmese Starred Tortoise, geometrically chic

Radiated Tortoise, also geometrically chic but maybe more art deco

Painted Terrapin, no need to send in the clowns

Leopard Tortoise, breaking the mold with a little art noveau

Bell’s Hingeback Tortoise, “You think box turtles got it on lockdown? Hold my noms and watch this!”

Impressed Tortoise, what it says on the tin

Cane Turtle, otherwise known as “Winner Of Turtle Death Glare Competition Since Forever”

Mata-Mata Turtle, the very definition of chaotic Neutral as a turtle

Spiny turtle, a very sharp and very dangerous boy

Cantor’s giant softshell turtle, a pancake with turtle pieces

Alligator snapping turtle, a real life honest dragon

The last one!!!

iguanamouth:

xmagnet-o:

professorevilbadpaingiver:

hallo-i-am-a-potato:

portmanteau-bot:

jamaicanblackcastoroil:

socialistexan:

ssansy:

jonlovett:

formerfundie:

how-late-am-i:

Like, look at it

It looks like a sunset

just

#the sky is bi confirmed

You wanna get people to hate you? Just claim the whole fucking sky belongs to your favorite kink.

the sky belongs to bisexuals now sorry str8s

I have legal rights on the sky purely because you called my sexuality a “kink” you piece of shit. You’re legally not allowed to look at the sky any more. Fuck you.

When you reject religion but keep all the shitty politics associated with it.

“Racial realist”

racial + realist = racist.

---

^{Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1}

At the end of the human world, you will be baked. And then there will be cake. | PayPal | Patreon

AFSHEBENRM

EVEN THE BOT DRAGGED HIM IM DONE

Damn lmaooo

asterisk-boobnoise:

pepelover22:

*runs myself over with a tractor*

YOU DONT UNDERSTAND —- MY UNCLE IS A FARMER
AND ONE DAY HE WAS GOING OUT TO CHECK HIS CROPS
HE NOTICES A TRACTOR JUST GOING AROUND IN CIRCLES
Thinks, “That’s weird, I go check it out”
HIS FUCKING NEIGHBOR FELL OFF HIS TRACTOR AND GOT RAN OVER But he was on a slope So the tractor went around and around in circles
Running him over each time
and he was pressed into the ground like a fucking cartoon
How long had he been there? Maybe an hour.
He was alive, and fine. Just pressed into the dirt like Wile. E Coyote and was so stuck in there that he couldn’t move so he just kept getting run over until my uncle found him

cookie-sheet-toboggan:

“Gay people just hate straight ships”

nope

we

just

like

healthy

ships

that

aren’t

toxic

justsayapple:

I saw this post and I had to redraw it aslkdfjsd