alexisrichter

fairygodrobot:

anxiety brain: IM GOING TO DIE ALONE AND UNCARED FOR

the other side of my brain which is wearing a hawaiian shirt: [cracks another sparkling water] yeah probably

advanced-procrastination:

trilllizard666:

fortangel:

mediocrepresident:

goldkat-g0negrey:

reblog the Don Draper of getting a job he’s unqualified for and you’ll have 10 years of getting jobs you’re unqualified for

YES

No but my dad actually did this at McDonalds in the 70s!

So here’s a true story: my father, sometime in the 70s was looking for his first job. He went to the local McDonalds and told the staff, [manager’s name] said I was supposed to start today. They took his word for it and started training him and by the time the manager saw him and asked who he was, people just said “oh that’s the new guy.”

Somehow this actually worked. My dad worked there for a couple of years as a cook. He even won an award plaque which he had on the wall until the day he died.

Confidence Helps

Me, walking into FBI Headquarters:

“Name’s Burt Macklin, I work here now.”

tinytheursaring:

Yes, I Trust Him

datanazush:

tredlocity:

Clark Kent is not a coward, he just hates Superman. The reason he runs off every time disaster occurs is cause he knows Superman will be there soon and he can’t stand the guy.

Clark Kent has to remove himself from the scene to keep from throwing hands at Superman.

221cbakerstreet:

elodieunderglass:

pringlesaremydivision:

boyyprince:

huffingtonpost:

Love Is Lifting These Queer Couples Higher In Incredible Trick Photo Series

They’ve been swept off their feet!

Finally…the gay agenda is almost complete. We’re growing more powerful by the minute.

l e v i t a t e t h e g a y s

this combines so many of my favorite things

wedding-affair:

Elihav Sasson | Bridal Collection “Royalty Girls” 2018

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lobstersonskateboards:

lobstersonskateboards:

never will I ever forget the time my friend told me about goddamn. mormon bubble porn

@glubablub @queenofthesafetypins

ok so

there’s a rule in mormonism that you Absolutely Cannot see a woman naked. however, since we as a species usually LOVE to jack off, people found a way around it.

basically what they do is take pictures of beautiful bikini women or whatever, and cover the bits that would be deemed unseeable, and creating bubbles around certain parts like the stomach and neck, to give off the illusion that they’re naked.

that way they can jack off freely without guilt. it is generally effective, but since it’s so obscure it looks like some kind of odd fetish.

In conclusion, anybody with a sex drive, no matter the religion, will absolutely try their hardest to jack off, even if it means really fuckin strange loopholes. thank u for ur time.

evilrick:

evilrick:

evilrick:

Making a second post since my situation is just not letting up and the first was gaining any traction! My rent is short for the month and i have two huge bills coming up in the following week/s. I wont be starting my new job until sometime next week so my first check will be far from my reach. Atleast another two weeks and my funds are literally at nothing right now. Until then i still need funds to eat and for transportation ON TOP of the up coming bills. If you wish to commission Ill draw anything sensible and do have a commissions post on my blog. Im only trying to raise about $350 to just make it till my first check. You may also donate from the goodness of your heart THANK YOU!

9/14/18 Thank you so so much to everyone donating and spreading this! Ive been super stressed about this havent even been eatting or sleeping much at all im so upset. $180 away from the completed goal…thank you all 😩🖤

9/19/18 Hey guys dont let this post die out! The more notes this gets less activity happens every time..Unfortunately imf still $150 away and still need to manage this week and the next! Thank you for your continued support!!