Author: alexisrichter

jumpingjacktrash:

nentuaby:

moonlandingwasfaked:

tilthat:

TIL The South Pole experiences a 6-month period of darkness, during which scientists at the Amundsen–Scott South Pole Station have a tradition of watching The Thing, a movie about a humanoid alien who attacks an Arctic research outpost.

via reddit.com

that’s the last time and place i wanna be watching the thing

Oh, it’s not just during the long night.

It’s *immediately* after the last flight goes out and there’s no possibility of evac until spring.

antarctic researchers are hardcore

askshadetrixieandfamily:

thorsbian:

thorsbian:

thorsbian:

Every time my extended family gets together in upstate ny, we (the Adults) all get wasted & at least 1 giant Family Scandal comes out…..tonight is that night..

We’ve Got A Winner Folks, And It Involves Arson AND A Nun!

So apparently my aunt cecelia (not really my aunt, just the best friend of my dads cousin, whomst we also call aunt) once married a dude referred to only as Florida Asshole. He was named such because he apparently left my aunt cecelia while she was in the hospital, stole all of their stuff, and fucked off to florida. Aunt cecelia then hired a p.i. to find him, as u do, and went down to florida with my dads cousin (who was going to florida for a work trip, and had no idea Florida Asshole was there). Apparently the p.i. told aunt cecelia which city the guy was in, but hadnt found the exact address yet, so ofc aunt cecelia did what any other able bodied half insane scorned person might. She went to a costume shop, bought a full nun costume, and went door to door under the assumption that she was collecting charity. (She did, in fact, donate everything she collected. This was an important fact to her). At one of the houses, she looked in the window and noticed an awful lot of furniture that used to be hers. So she, obviously, went to a gas station and bought several cans of gasoline, threw a molotov cocktail through the front window, and began pouring gasoline over the rest of the house. At this point, Florida Asshole came outside, recognized his ex wife looking like a renegade nun sent to punish him for his sins, and began beating her. The neighbors, seeing the strange new man beating a nun in his front yard while his house was on fire, did the only sensible thing in this story and called the police. Who promptly arrested Florida Asshole for assaulting a nun. Aunt cecelia did not get arrested, came clean to her best friend, and was immediately sent back to new york with a ticket bought under my other aunt’s name. We don’t know if she still has an arrest warrant out for her in florida, and that’s tonight’s Family Scandal!

peeniss-everlark-forever:

cryptomaster-leviathan:

tentadog:

fangasmagorical:

aftselakhis-shaladin:

fangasmagorical:

aftselakhis-shaladin:

tentadog:

ok all drama involving jk rowling and nagini being a fuckin person and shit aside

yall know milking snakes is not. milking their fucking snake titties. right

you guys know snakes don’t have tiddies… . . right

YALL

YOU KNOW THIS RIGHT? YOU KNOW MILKING A SNAKE MEANS TO EXTRACT THEIR VENOM 

RIGHT?

I thought about venom extraction when I was reading the book ad a child too, but unfortunately there exists a planned illustration that shows babyfied Voldemort sucking on a snake tit.

THERE’S AN ILLUSTRATION OF W H A T

I found it on internet some time ago. It was supposted to go with illustrated version of Goblet of Fire.

This is the worst fucking image I have ever seen in my entire life please kill me (NSFW for snake titties)

y’know, i never really took that phrase “ every day we drift further from god’s light “ seriously. But guess what, today is the day that i start doing that.

because i’m sure god is looking down at us full of shame